dealing with ‘difficult’ people

It’s day 48 of not smoking, my sense of smell is returning. It’s important to note, because I could smell their perfume. It was lovely to be able to have my sense of smell back, and the perfume was at least pleasant on the one hand, and a violation of personal space and boundaries on the other.

You sat in my chair. Do it again, and I’ll break your legs. I think to myself, noting three things:

1. I hadn’t eaten, so I tend towards hangry. (it’s a thing)

2. I’m not a fan of violations of my personal space – historically boundaries have been an issue.

3. I can’t actually ‘do’ anything about this situation, and must allow it to play out in full before taking an action.

Sidebar: Angry responses are not authorized, ever – there are laws, rules, and regulations prohibiting this; plus, I’m a nice gal. I want what’s best for people. I’m adult enough to be able to identify the ‘feelings’ (ugh feelings) and also self-aware enough to acknowledge that they exist. Feelings are an informational insight into a moment in time. Feelings are temporary, and feelings are not fatal.

It’s curious and interesting simultaneously to look inwards on the subject – and outwards at the resulting potential conflict. Could I raise the issue? Sure. However; everything has a price. These are issues and subscriptions to being human magazine that I get to work on; among the millions of others that I get to navigate in my day-to-day life.

I’m fascinated with human behaviour. Enamored by the experience of ‘being human’ and curious – oh so curious!

What is it about individuals that drives them to deliberately want to utilize any perceived vulnerabilities (or better yet, the ‘office gossip’) as weapons against another? I’ve seen this first-hand in every job I’ve ever worked, across multiple industries.

I frame this experience, as I do all others in the arena, naming it after a painting by Pieter Bruegel the Elder from 1568; The Magpie on the Gallows.

The painting itself depicts a landscape of a woodland clearing, in the center is the ‘impossible’ object (think MC Escher triangle – penrose) and on the left side, are peasants dancing; on the right, the empirical castle. This particular painting may very well be a political objection.

The point is, the problems of the past, are the same as the problems of the present. There is a thread of inhumane humanity at work so to speak.

In certain corporate or hierarchical structures – it’s a pecking order; and once someone determines that they’ve gotten something either better or worse, the game changes. The balance must be struck among employees between the business need, and the human/emotional need. It’s a delicate balance, and requires all parties to be in agreement. We may not like the arrangements, however we work with what we’ve got, to get what we need to get done, in order to push the Sisyphean rock up the hill. Again, and again, and again, and again. Day in – and day out.

We call this ‘grinding’ or ‘get ‘er done’ or ‘hustling’. Same principle, universal application. Part and parcel of the human experience.

These are my 3am thoughts as I sip on my morning brew, because insomnia is both a gift, and a curse. At least I’m working on trying to be productive, by providing free entertainment between poetic inference and random acts of wordsmithing.

May your day be well versed, and unrehearsed; off the mark, and on point. May your cup be filled by your beverage of choice, and may you have gratitude that there is a cup worth filling.

Inner peace and outward joy, today, and all days.

Be well,

Kelly K Green

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